Personality Disorder: Understand, Support and Promote Long-Term Change

Personality disorders involve enduring patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving that significantly differ from cultural expectations and cause distress or difficulties in relationships, work or everyday life. These patterns are usually long-standing, beginning in adolescence or early adulthood, and affect a person’s sense of self, emotional regulation and ability to relate to others.

While the term "personality disorder" can sound confronting, it is important to remember that these are recognised mental health conditions. They are treatable, and with the right support, people can learn new ways to relate, respond and live fulfilling lives.

What is a Personality Disorder

A personality disorder is diagnosed when someone has persistent and inflexible patterns of behaviour and inner experience that deviate from social norms. These patterns affect the way a person:

• Thinks about themselves and others
• Feels and responds emotionally
• Relates to people and forms relationships
• Controls their impulses and behaviours

There are several types of personality disorders, commonly grouped into three clusters:

Cluster A (odd or eccentric):
Includes paranoid, schizoid and schizotypal personality disorders.

Cluster B (dramatic or emotional):
Includes borderline, narcissistic, histrionic and antisocial personality disorders.

Cluster C (anxious or fearful):
Includes avoidant, dependent and obsessive compulsive personality disorders.

Each person’s experience is different. Some may show traits of more than one type, and others may not fit neatly into a category.

What Causes Personality Disorders

Personality disorders are believed to arise from a complex combination of factors:

• Genetics and temperament
• Early life experiences, including trauma, neglect or abuse
• Attachment disruptions or inconsistent parenting
• Environmental stressors in childhood or adolescence
• Brain development and emotional regulation difficulties

These conditions are not a personal failing or something a person chooses. They are shaped by a mix of inherited and life factors, and most people with a personality disorder have experienced significant early life adversity.

Common Signs and Challenges

Personality disorders vary widely, but common experiences may include:

• Intense and unstable emotions
• Difficulty trusting others or forming close relationships
• Fear of abandonment or rejection
• Impulsive behaviours or self-harm
• Persistent feelings of emptiness or low self-worth
• Black and white thinking or shifting views of others
• Trouble maintaining jobs or social roles
• Conflict with others due to rigid thinking or behaviour

These patterns often lead to distress not only for the person but also for their loved ones. Many people with personality disorders experience repeated crises or long-standing feelings of disconnection.

Myths about Personality Disorders

Myth: People with personality disorders are manipulative or dangerous
Truth: This stigma is harmful and false. Most people with personality disorders are trying to manage overwhelming internal experiences and deserve compassion and care.

Myth: Personality disorders cannot be treated
Truth: While change may take time, therapy can be highly effective. Many people with personality disorders experience significant improvements in relationships and functioning.

Myth: Only certain types, like borderline or narcissistic, are real disorders
Truth: All personality disorders are recognised by clinical criteria. Each presents unique challenges and requires tailored support.

Why Seeking Help Matters

Without support, personality disorders can contribute to:

• Chronic relationship problems
• Risk of self-harm or suicidal thoughts
• Substance use or addiction
• Workplace or academic difficulties
• Ongoing emotional distress and social isolation

With professional help, individuals can:

• Understand the roots of their patterns and behaviours
• Learn new emotional and relational skills
• Improve self-worth and personal identity
• Strengthen resilience and reduce crisis episodes
• Build healthier, more fulfilling relationships

How MeHelp Psychology Can Assist You

We provide structured and compassionate care for people experiencing personality-related difficulties. Our psychologists are trained in evidence-based approaches and offer:

• Comprehensive assessment and treatment planning
• Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) for emotional regulation, distress tolerance and interpersonal effectiveness
• Schema Therapy to address deep-rooted patterns and early life beliefs
• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) for unhelpful thinking and behaviour patterns
• Trauma-informed care for those with histories of abuse or neglect
• Support for families and partners to improve understanding and communication

Real-Life Example

Josh, 27, had a history of unstable relationships, emotional outbursts and self-harm. He often felt abandoned and struggled to trust others. With ongoing DBT through MeHelp, Josh developed tools to manage intense emotions, build healthier connections and gradually improve his sense of self. He now reports fewer crisis episodes and a stronger sense of direction in life.

Practical Steps You Can Take Today

• Reflect on patterns that repeat in your relationships or emotional responses
• Journal your thoughts and feelings to increase self-awareness
• Learn about emotional regulation techniques such as breathing or grounding
• Focus on small, achievable changes rather than all-or-nothing goals
• Avoid self-blame and recognise the role of early experiences
• Reach out for professional support when you feel stuck or overwhelmed

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Can personality disorders really change
Yes. With the right support, people can develop insight, regulate emotions and form more stable relationships. Change is possible even when patterns have been present for many years.

Do you diagnose personality disorders at MeHelp
Yes. Our psychologists can assess personality functioning and help clarify whether your experiences align with a specific personality disorder. We do this carefully and with your consent.

Is medication used for personality disorders
Medication may be used to treat symptoms such as anxiety, depression or impulsivity, but therapy is the primary treatment for personality disorders.

Is therapy online effective for personality disorders
Yes. Many of our clients benefit from online therapy, especially when sessions are structured and focused on skills development and long-term change.

Take the First Step

Living with a personality disorder can feel lonely and overwhelming, but change is possible. With support, you can better understand yourself, build emotional stability and create meaningful connections.

Book a confidential session with MeHelp Psychology today and begin your path toward healing and self-discovery.